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Joke of the Day
"""You got a friend in me"" - your friend's girlfriend"
Next Joke
"What do you call 4 dicks tied together? An erectangle."
"Q: What do you call a fly with no wings? A: A walk."
"""Arise! Arise! Foul creatures, I command that you arise! ARISE!"" ""Dad, just once, couldn't you let mom or the alarm clock wake us?"" ""ARISE!"""
"(After you win something, say this to the loser). You're like an Italian man with his foot in his mouth (Italian accent) You tasted defeat."
"Make the little things count....... teach mathematics to midgets"
"What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Everyone thinks it's 'R', but his first love be the 'C'."
"Why do farts smell? so deaf people can enjoy them too."
"Some say Blair Walsh tried to commit suicide... ...but it went wide left. Being a Vikings fan is painful"
"I like my women like a microwave. She is hot and kills all the babies i put inside her."