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Joke of the Day

"did you hear about the Indian restaurant that ran out of bread? it was a naan issue sorry"

"There's no law that says you can't use a tiny pancake as an eyepatch."

"Whenever I'm feeling I'm getting soft I log in to Facebook to rekindle my hate for humanity."

"Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Six. One to screw in the lightbulb and five to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience."

"Farmer Dad: Having a good party son? Farmer Son: No. The music sucks. FD: Well then- FS: Don't. FD: Lettuce turnip the beet."

"What's Hitlers least favorite drink? Jewce"

"When I call a family meeting I turn off the house wifi and wait for them all to come running."

"A good comedian is like a good dictatorship. Consistent in their execution."

"Where's the best place to apologise to someone? Surrey."

"FOUND: IPod Touch 4G, 32GB, white. Must be able to match the naked pics I found in the photos."