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Joke of the Day

"""I want a guy who treats me right, listens to me and makes me feel good. But until then, I'll keep dating a$$holes and complaining."" Women"

"I told my dad about the school shooting today I don't know why he got so worked up over picture day"

"If a girl is preventing you from reaching your goal then she's a keeper"

"Why would the cannibal only eat babies? He was on a diet!"

"[at a farm] Dairy cow: Oooh that tickles Sheep: Look I got a new ""hairdo"" Chicken: Cool I didn't want to know any of my children anyway"

"Then god created Saturn, And he liked it. So he put a ring on it"

"What's the definition of endless love? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis"

"Three men walk into a bar... ... the fourth one ducks. edit: grammar"

"Q: Why didn't the grizzly wear any shoes? A: He wanted to go bear foot."

"What does a mermaid stoner smoke? Seaweed."