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Joke of the Day

"Jesus was such a hypocrite Preaches waiting for marriage and all that. Meanwhile he just goes and gets nailed 3 times in one day."

"What do you call safe sex with a horse Trojan"

"A husband came home with half a gallon of ice cream and asked his wife if she wanted some. ""How hard is it?"" she asked. ""About as hard as my dick."" he replied. ""Pour me some."""

"So I thought I was going to buy a TV this weekend... Turns out I'm just sick of all these shitty forced puns on /r/Jokes."

"I met this guy named Times New Roman... But he just wasn't my type."

"What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? -A widow."

"To ensure that my wife will truly miss me when I go on trips, right before I leave I put a few spiders in the bedroom."

"I was going to make a joke about pepper but it was too insalting."

"What do we want?! LOW FLYING AIRPLANE NOISES! When do want them?! NNNNNNEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWW!!!"

"A roman centurion walks into a bar... He holds up two fingers and says: ""Five beers, please."""