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Joke of the Day

"Millionaire Interview Interviewer : Sir, who helped you on becoming a Millionaire? Millionaire : My wife........ I was a billionaire before."

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"Just saw a commercial for ""affordable napkins"" and now I feel stupid for buying all these diamond-encrusted ones."
"Why did the Tumblr user get cut up on Halloween? She identified as pump-kin."
"What do silicon and my ex girlfriend have in common? the resistance of both drop when doped."
"""what do we want?"" ""faster Internet!"" ""when do we want it?"". Loading..."
"I didn't get a chance to do yoga this morning or any other morning of my life."
"*walks into starbucks* Me: HEY ANY ASPIRING AUTHORS HERE?? SOMEONE FROM PENGUIN PUBLISHING OUTSIDE!!! *has choice of any table*"
"Right? That noise. ~Me pretending that I know what I'm talking about when I get my car serviced"
"Why are pills white? Because they work"
"What kind of car does god drive? A Christler"
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