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Joke of the Day

"""and this lake shall be called Superior"" all the other Great Lakes: ""k wow we're like right here"""

"When my girlfriend and I decided to make it official, I told her: I have to tell you, before we met, I was... well...promiscuous. Oh cool she exclaimed. I love Greek mythology."

"What is a vampire's favourite soup ? Scream of mushroom !"

"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he saw a dolphin caught in a net? ""It's not a too-nah!"""

"Low self esteem group meeting Please use the back door"

"Putting on mascara without opening my mouth is on my bucket list"

"Gas should cost /gallon. Since the price is irrational."

"A robot walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey, we don't serve robots!"" Robot says, ""Oh, but someday you will."""

"The cashier at McDonald's was more than happy to warm up some Diet Coke for my baby's bottle."

"How do the Russian people feel about their government? They're Putin up with it."