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Joke of the Day

"I wish I could get bitten by a radioactive confident person."

"Where did the engine go after he retired? To live in a motor home"

"My girlfriend wanted me to make her feel like she's the only girl in the world. So I signed her up for Electrical Engineering."

"The one upside to having twins Deciding how to split child custody during the divorce."

"Nobel Prize winners are a lot like farmers Oftentimes they are outstanding in their field."

"What noise does Doppler's cat make? Meeeeeaaaaaaoooooo^oooowwww^wwww^www"

"What do you call a sleep walking nun? A Roman Catholic"

"In 8th grade I had to take care of an egg to teach me responsibility. That egg hatched, and I raised the chicken as my own. He was delicious"

"Why does OP never deliver? [removed]"

"Nobody has 3 cats. You either have 1 or 2, but from there you leap directly to 17."