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Joke of the Day

"Cabbies, stop acting like paying with a credit card is the worst thing to happen to you since you were a child soldier in your homeland."

Next Joke
 
"""i like a woman that's loud in the bedroom"" *wife smashes a bulldozer through the bedroom wall with 2 air horns blaring* ""damn i love you"""
"I never knew I was allergic to iron... Because after hitting the weights I get swollen."
"What do Pedophiles hand out after dinner? Under eights"
"Why did the ""M&M;"" go to university? He wanted to become a ""Smartie"""
"I smoked weed to think of something funny to post [deleted]"
"Love is not the number of times you kissed her, but the number of moments you were dying to kiss her."
"What do you get when you cross-breed a shark and a cow? I have no idea but I wouldn't try milking it"
"I've always lived by the motto 'work hard, play hard' But the HR department is starting to get concerned and the guys I ball with at the gym hate when I guard them"
"Apparently I have a few ""tells"" when I'm angry. But I light things on fire when I'm happy too so don't pretend you know me."