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Joke of the Day

"Every morning I wake up and every morning there is no breakfast in bed. We have got to do something about this level of poverty!"

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"gonna have me one of them sexy closed-casket funerals, leave somethin to the imagination"
"My brother recently got married To celebrate, my mother decided to pull out a couple bottles from my late father's homemade alcohol collection. That way he could be there in spirits"
"Today your brother-in-law will announce his plan to defeat ISIS. Happy Thanksgiving."
"Knock Knock..... Whos there?? 9x11 9x11 Who?? 9x11 paper fight... I came up with this is a fit of insanity from sleep deprivation, so just laugh at it."
"Saying the Punchline After the Setup What's the key to a good joke?"
"My physics teacher tells the most horrible jokes... Q: What does iron man eat in Burger King? A:iron rings! Q: What does iron man do in his spare time? A: Iron clothes..."
"Why do people looking for motivational seminars and people attending bodybuilding competitions keep accidentally going to each other's events? They both want personal growth."
"At the touch of her lips, it grew long and swollen. I gasped as she squeezed and pulled. It was the best balloon giraffe I'd ever seen."
"Batman went to Penguin's bar and was given the wrong drink... Just ice was served."