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Joke of the Day
"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."
Next Joke
"I currently live in a college apartment with four other dudes... we go through toilet paper like Hitler went through the Jews"
"me: did you know beethoven was deaf date: the dog? me: of course the dog"
"A vegan, a crossfitter, and an atheist are sitting in a bar. But you wouldnt know it, thanks to the Texan telling you all about Texas"
"I just whispered ""Come at me, bro"" to a bug and it ran towards me, so now I'm in my car driving away from my old life."
"What they say: Want a bite of my sandwich? What I hear: How much of this sandwich can you fit in your mouth?"
"If your donkey ate my chicken's feet... You'd have two feet of my cock in your ass."
"There are three kinds of people People who count and people who don't."
"Forgetting what you went into the kitchen to get is one thing but, it's darn scary when you can't remember why you went into the bathroom!"
"Why do people have sex when they go camping? Because it's fucking in tents!"