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Joke of the Day

"What did Journey say to the critic as he stormed out of their concert? ""Don't stop! Be leaving!"" Just a joke I thought up the other day."

"What does Donald Trump say after sex? I never saw that woman in my life."

"What did OJ say to Nicole just before he killed her? *Your waiter will be with you in a moment, ma'am*. (was reading an OJ post in another sub and remembered this one.)"

"How do German people not choke to death when they talk"

"Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the dirt, then cross back over? Because he's a dirty double crosser."

"What's the hardest part of running over a baby? My dick."

"Q: What's the abominable snowman's favourite food? A: Spag-yeti."

"SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE John: I didn't sleep with my wife before we were married. Did you? Bob: I'm not sure. What was your wife's maiden name?"

"gf: i'm breaking up with you. me: is it my drinking habits? gf: well it... me: *interrupts with empty cup straw-sipping noise for 2 minutes*"

"Cow tipping is a myth. Cattle rarely tip even when the service is good."