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Joke of the Day
"I remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year... Now, it's Election night."
Next Joke
"I would be a terrible stalker because A) not motivated enough 7) you would always hear the rattle of peanut m&ms behind you."
"If six children and two dogs were under an umbrella how come none of them got wet? Because it wasn't raining."
"Q: What do electric trains and breasts have in common? A: They're intended for children but it's the men who usually end up playing with them."
"Two fish were in a tank... and one says ""How do you drive this thing?"""
"Jersey Shore star Mike Sorrentino was indicted on tax charges today The Situation does not look good legally."
"The Bermuda Triangle A.K.A.... Clinton's Inbox"
"NASA recently confirmed what I've always suspected ...even Mars has more flow than Kanye West."
"Why do the cops monitor the store that sells upper-case letters for computers? It's a shifty business."
"How to create a weight-loss program: (1) Take a before picture. (2) Eat like a pig. (3) Take an after picture. (4) Switch the pictures."