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Joke of the Day

"Q: How do you know a blonde has just lost her virginity? A: Her crayons are still sticky."

"Boss: Staff meeting at 3:00. Me: I can't come, I'm allergic. Boss: But we're not serving food. Me: ... yeah now I really can't come."

"I'm an adrenaline junkie and an agoraphobic. I talked to the mailman through the door once, that was a rush delivered. Edit: delivered."

"I held a door for an elderly Japanese man. He said ""Sank you."" Why did he have to bring up Pearl Harbor like that?"

"How many sperm cells do virgins have at any given time? Ohh.. About a handful."

"People always complain that Jewish people have all the money. Well if 6 million of your people died, you'd expect at least some inheritance"

"A guy calls 911 ""Send an ambulance! My wife's having a baby!"" ""Just calm down down"", says the operator, ""Is this her first baby?"" ""No it's her husband you idiot!"""

"What's one thing today that women are better at than men compared to the 1800's? Gold digging"

"If the house is in the kitchen, and Diana's in the kitchen, what's in Diana? A state (Indiana)"

"What do you call a mod in r/News ? [Removed]"