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Joke of the Day
"Why did Adele cross the road? To say,""HELLO FROM THE OTHER SIDE!"" (ba dum tss)"
Next Joke
"Broken puppets for sale... No strings attached."
"Mom thinks I run google :D [Mom thinks I run google - My Funny Mom](http://www.etcpb.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/Mom-thinks-I-run-google.jpg)"
"Malaria kills a child every two seconds in Africa... Somebody should arrest that guy."
"I went to the School of Engineering formal this weekend. Walked up to a girl... ""Are you a civil engineer... cause DAM GIRL!"" she went home with me..."
"Dear Santa, Please send gift cards. Your taste has gotten significantly worse in recent years."
"Today is the coldest day of the year... And the warmest, shortest, longest, driest and most wet."
"Guy walks up to his wife with a duck under his arm... ""Honey. This is the pig I've been fucking for the last ten years."" ""That's not a pig, it's a duck!"" ""I was talking to the duck."""
"What do you call a blind trig function? Se-cant."
"How do I tell a guy that I'm only interested in him because I'd like to take selfies with his puppy?"