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Joke of the Day

"If you've had a lightsaber pointed at you while you were on the toilet you may be a parent ...or your life is way more interesting than mine"

"I saw my ex wife in a grocery store. ""Having fun there?"" I asked her, as she felt up the apples. ""Does that remind you of someone?"" She said, ""No, but this does,"" Then she started rubbing the grapes."

"How did Jared lose 150lbs? He kicked two 7-year-olds out of his bed."

"What did the parrot say when he was using the Internet? P.Cs of eight P.Cs of eight."

"What do you call a child with no friends? A target"

"www.google.corn"

"What do you call a vagina that talks back to you? An answering cervix"

"My dad on cheese Me talking to my sister: Me: don't you think you'll get constipated with all that cheese Dad: I don't think she'll give a shit"

"What do you call a nutty dog in Australia ? A dingo-ling !"

"I can't believe they let people own guns. Public toilets are all the proof we need that humans have horrible aim."