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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new Indian version of Oliver Twist? ""Please, can I have samosa?"""

"Anyone know the exact alcohol content of ""lady humps""? How drunk am I going to get off them?"

"Condoms prevent minivans."

"Why was the two-dimensional emo sad? Because nobody would ever know how deep he was."

"I used to hate having athlete's foot... ...but it's growing on me"

"What do you call a girl hanging from a basketball rim? Annette"

"I'm a humble person, really. I'm actually much greater than I think I am."

"What did you learn in school today? Not enough I have to go back tomorrow!"

"Why are there no Jews on Jupiter? Because it's a gas planet."

"As a quiet and skinny person, I feel like we should charge loud and fat people more to ride the subway. It won't be difficult to implement either. All we would need to do is charge them by volume."