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Joke of the Day

"Rap is 75% crap"

"Four years ago I asked out the girl of my dreams, today I asked her to marry me She said no both times"

"The only things that defy gravity are women... ...the heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up."

"What s the difference between toilet paper and toast? Toast is brown on both sides."

"I went camping last week... And oh boy, it was in tents."

"The team that finished first in the local boat race were allowed to keep their boat. Scenes of celebration broke out when they realized they had won the champion ship."

"ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter] EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone? ME: You must be new here."

"I'll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions."

"Whats Lil' Waynes favorite pizza place? Little seizures"

"Places in Japan nowadays have banned some of the traditional Martial Arts, They have adopted a strictly no Kendo attitude"