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Joke of the Day

"I make the stupidest excuses just to skip the gym. *burns tongue while drinking coffee* ""Oh no! I really wanted to go to the gym today!"""

"You may think I know fuck nothing ... But let me tell you. I know fuck all."

"I'm not in favour of student loans. I think people should get their own student."

"Why were the hens lying on their backs with their legs in the air ? Because eggs were going up !"

"What do you use to compare and contrast nordic cultures? A Sven diagram!"

"50's kids probably won't have this... Parents"

"Princess Dianna had dandruff They found her head and shoulders in the glovebox."

"I bet the hardest thing about being a gangsta rapper is never being able to really enjoy a scone in public."

"Do you know how to keep an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you later."

"I don't have many friends: I don't have many friends but I can draw pretty well, so I drew a bunch of friends But I only draw in black pen.. So I feel really uncomfortable"