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Joke of the Day

"If someone enjoys bondage, and they hang themselves... Does that mean they died from having a kink in their neck?"

"How did the Shepherd find the sheep in the tall grass? ... Satisfying."

"I just burned 12000 calories I left the pizza in the oven"

"Turns out the easiest way to piss of a vegan is to refer to their veganism as their ""eating disorder""."

"It's amazing how a simple act of kindness can change my bad mood into a suspicious bad mood."

"The only thing worse than Friday the 13th, is Monday the 13th"

"In case you think you have the laziest cat in the world, my cat has had a turd half-in/half-out her butt hole all afternoon."

"What's the only thing an Irish person can hold on to? A grudge."

"Waiter: I'm sorry to keep you waiting. Your soup will be ready soon. Customer: What bait are you using?"

"What's Irish and stays out all year? Patty O'furniture."