1085

Joke of the Day

"I think the only thing a bike helmet protects you from is getting laid"

"[at work] Carl, did you get naked when you used the bathroom? *standing there with his shirt & pants on backwards* ""No...why do you ask?"""

"How do you end a relationship fight? You break it up."

"I tried to give myself a sex change But I just couldn't pull it off. Credit to Rohan Ganju a young upcoming Australian comedian."

"Are your parents retarded? ...because you're one special lady!"

"""It's pronounced poor-shah, not por-shh."" ""Ok, got it doo-shah."""

"The town I'm in has chickens roaming around freely. I hear that our dog went chasing one a while ago, but nobody can tell me the date. I don't know when she ran a fowl."

"The TSA agent who runs the x-ray machine just told me ""Nice penis."" Thank you, Al Qaeda!"

"Me + Bed + Pillow = Best threesome ever."

"Got kicked off the cruise ship after three day of constantly saying ""poop deck"" & snickering."