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Joke of the Day

"If I were a ghost, I'd spell ""antidisestablishmentarianism"" on the Ouija board just to waste those idiots' time."

"The sign down the highway said ""Don't be a turkey, don't text and drive"" They misspelled vegetable."

"Why can't women enjoy porn as much as men? They can tell when the girls are faking it. (This joke best after a few drinks)"

"My ex girlfriend kept stuffed animals all over her bed. It really killed the mood... ...because she was a taxidermist."

"Wow. Girl 1) Isn't that illegal? Girl 2) Yeah, so is prostitution but I didn't stop your mom. Girl 1) You don't know my mom. Girl 2) Neither did your dad."

"My wife don't want to have anal sex Butt fuck her"

"Once you go black, you can always go back to having coffee with milk, there's really no set in stone rules here."

"Me and my German girlfriend like to rate our sex on a one to ten scale while having sex. So last night we were having sex and we tried anal. The whole time she was yelling out nine!"

"Did you hear about the midget that got kicked out of the nudist colony? He was getting into everybody's hair..."

"as i guy, i sometimes pee while sitting usually only when the bus doesn't have a bathroom"