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Joke of the Day

"A friend told me to try Viagra, he said it'll make me feel like James Bond. I don't know about that but I can defiantly feel my Rodger Moore."

"The inventor of the USB cable died recently. They're still trying to figure out which way to put his casket in the ground."

"All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word."

"A few days ago I wanted to share a sandwich with a homeless person... ...but then he told me to fuck of and that I should buy my own sandwich."

"What do you call a Pirate who lost his anchor? ""can't anchor us"" /bow.. this is as clever as i get, people.. so sorry."

"How do you know if someone's a feminist? They have an AK and they plan to kill all men. /shittyjoke\"

"Here's my Bruce Jenner joke I made a joke"

"NASA spent 1.5mil on a pen that works in space. Russia putin a pencil."

"Looting has hit London's Covent Garden Specifically the new Apple Store. Police are looking for iWitnesses."

"womens rights"