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Joke of the Day
"Why are there no penguins in Britain? They're scared of Wales."
Next Joke
"Ikea said if they catch me stealing any more kitchen utensils I'll be banned for life. But I'm willing to take the whisk."
"Star Wars (1977): A wounded warrior overcomes severe burn injuries to build a massive empire only to see his estranged son destroy it."
"What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective? Santa Clues. Credit: Curious: The Tourist's Guide"
"It is well known..."
"What is 7'' long, rock hard, and makes girls scream at it's sight? The sock under my bed."
"Drug companies are like high school boyfriends They're much more concerned with getting inside you than being effective once they get in there. - Credit to John Oliver"
"Jesus: Unless you become like children you will not enter heaven *Gets hit by a water ballon* Jesus: That's not what I meant, Paul"
"I like that Linkin Park song where the guy suddenly screams."
"When a character in a movie says the title in the middle of dialogue they should be required to wink and make tiny guns with their fingers."