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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the boy born with no eyelids? Doctors decided to make some for him out of his foreskin. They say that the boy is doing fine now, but he's a little cock-eyed."

"What did the creationist student say when asked why he didn't have his homework on natural selection? My dogma ate it."

"""Pick a card, any card, make sure you memorize it, now put it back with the rest"": me, with my wife at the Hallmark Store on Valentine's Day"

"There was a Spanish magician who said he could disappear. He said he would disappear on the count of 3. He said ""Unos... Dos..."" **POOF** And then he disappeared without a tres."

"So some Mexican lady named Patricia listened to the new Adele and cried so much she's flooding Mexico"

"Hey baby, have you got a time machine? Cuz' I could go back in time to approach you with a better pickup line than this one"

"An enormous monster with eight arms and eleven legs walked into a tailors shop. 'Quick!' shouted the tailor to his assistant. 'Hide the ""Free Alterations"" sign!'"

"How many virgins do I get from dying of embarrassment? Does anyone know?"

"The U.S mint stopped making pennies. I don't know why, it doesn't make any cents."

"Why arent there any Socialist entrepreneurs? Seriously I dont know....."