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Joke of the Day

"My grandma keeps talking about her monthly checks, prescription drugs and how much she loves Miami. I think she's a rapper."

"[soup kitchen] *homeless man is handed a plate* What the hell is this? -Turkey bacon. *throws tray against wall* I'm hungry! Not desperate!"

"How do you get a nun pregnant? Dress her up like an alter boy."

"Who was the fattest Pharaoh of ancient Egypt? Hippo-Ptolemy"

"My housemate told me to get something to the front page of reddit I should just recycle... It'll take a lot more than that to get me to take the bins out!"

"What do you call a funny baked good? a pun"

"What is white on top and black on the bottom? Society."

"How's your day been? Grape!"

"What's 6 inches long and starts with a p? ........... a shit (think about it)"

"What do you call a digital tree? All bark and no byte"