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Joke of the Day

"Why shouldn't ISIS be destroying ancient Mesopotamian buildings? Because it's frowned upon in Islam to smoke ziggurats."

"When life gets tough, remember this: You were the strongest sperm."

"What'd the banana say to the vibrator? Why are you shaking? She's gonna eat me."

"I bet Hitler & the guy who invented the car alarm belong to a book club together in hell."

"Blonde joke Blonde: ""What does IDK stand for?"" Brunette: ""I don't know."" Blonde: ""OMG, like, nobody does!"""

"A group of dogs walk into a University. They approach the receptionist who says, ""Hi, can I help you?"" ""Yeah,"" one of the dogs reply, ""We wanna see our Masters."""

"What was the score of the lobster soccer game? Zero to zero. Lobsters can't kick soccer balls."

"I downloaded the Pinterest app and now my phone is stuck in a mason jar."

"in a way, things are looking up for america... Soon it'll no longer be an obama-nation"

"I used to crush cans for a living, didn't like it though... It was soda pressing."