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Joke of the Day

"I got this amazing girl's number at work today See you later Jane Doe 522/16!"

"The best time to leave the country is when a demonic voice screams your name from inside a locked basement"

"There's a type of bee that after it stings you, you pass out and it tries to have sex with you. It's a Cos-Bee."

"Baby I am an Animal in Bed More Specifically A Koala,I can sleep 22 hrs a day. Credit:A friend"

"When I wss a kid I got kicked out of the Boy Scouts For eating a Brownie."

"Which trees miss you the most? Pine trees"

"What's the best thing about alzheimers? You're always meeting new people."

"This crunchy cat food tastes a lot like I just poured from the wrong packet into my cereal bowl."

"I am not an accident waiting to happen. I am an accident. Happening."

"What noise did the dumbbells make when they were dropped? ... Dong-Ding."