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Joke of the Day

"Honey, what is the name of that German that hides things around the house? Alzheimer grandma, Alzheimer!"

"What does Justin Timberlake say when he's going to the bathroom? ""It's Gonna Be Pee"""

"my gang colors are taupe and beige"

"Just saw a dude with a row of pimples that looked exactly like a sick handlebar moustache. Nice one, puberty."

"I just got done watching the Lego Movie with my daughter. The premise is so amazing... It makes me wonder why the Mega Blocks movie fell apart."

"Jesus drove a Honda but didn't talk about it... ""For I did not speak of my own Accord ..."" John 12:49"

"Superman: I got this Batman: I'll help S: Look, you just slow me down B: I'm a detective S: ... B: I have batarangs S: Do you hear yourself?"

"What do they call me in prison? Mitochondria, cause I'm the powerhouse of the cell"

"I wish there was a way to musically tell someone to pour sugar on you but there isn't"

"Has anyone seen my jacket? It's white with sleeves that make you hug yourself and a cute belt."