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Joke of the Day

"This tweet has been brought to you by... ...Stay Free Maxi-pads... ...When your uterine lining looks like the elevator from The Shining."

"Q: What were Bill and Chelsea Clinton doing in the voting booth? A: Bill was giving his daughter a lesson in Civics how to ruin the people!"

"Where do Russians stream movies from? Nyetflix."

"If Rob Ford was a duck what he would be smoking? Quack"

"Why is it easy for gays to escape a fire? Because their shit is already packed."

"Prince's housekeeper of 30 years was offered a job as a crime scene investigator. She was considered highly qualified due to her decades of experience dusting for Prince."

"What do black people get after death? Nigger mortis"

"What does a painter do when he gets cold? Puts on another coat."

"Knock knock ""who's there?"" ""Europe"" ""Europe who?"" ""No, you're a poo"""

"Oxygen and Potassium went on a date. It went O.K."