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Joke of the Day

"I hate when people text 'call me'. I'm going to start calling people, say 'text me' and then hang up."

"Dad joke Son: ""Dad, tell me a joke."" Dad: ""Pussy."" Son: ""I don't get it."" Dad: ""I know."""

"A: My bag is getting heavier B: Why? A: Because I don't smoke... B: How does it matter?? A: ""It ain't got any lighter"""

"Waiter what's this bug doing waltzing around my table ! It's the band sir they are playing his tune !"

"Whiteboards are just the best In fact, they're remarkable"

"The good thing about women who like F1 is that they like men who finish fast"

"Whats a Porn Stars Favorite Drink? 7up in cider."

"What do skeletons like to put on their meat? Grave-y."

"I didn't realize how religious the Japanese are. Always asking me if I have a pray station at home."

"me: well I grew up without a dad and I turned out okay cw: don't u collect human teeth?? me: yeah but they're not my teeth"