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Joke of the Day

"What is more powerful than God, more evil than the Devil, poor people have it, if you eat it, you will die? Diarrhoea"

"How much for the giant, walk-in medicine cabinet? ""Sir, this is a liquor store."""

"My subscription brings all the newspapers to the yard."

"If Oliver Stone is being a stone and Michael Bay is being a bay, then what is Anthony Weiner being? Bullied"

"I was diagnosed with Tom Jones Syndrome yesterday. I asked the doctor if it was a rare condition. ""It's not unusual""."

"Did you hear about the cross-eyed carpenter? He *literally* can't even."

"What do you call the area where a horse lives? The NEIGHHHHHHborhood"

"When I was a kid my mother stopped breast feeding me. I asked her why and she says ""hey, I just wanna be friends."""

"I can't stand people who are indirect You know who you are"

"How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb? Two: one to screw in the bulb and one to hold the ~~cock~~ ~~father~~ LADDER"