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Joke of the Day

"I was kicked out of karate class today for describing everything the instructor did as ""senseitational"""

"Alcohol is best served."

"I get home and realize where my house stood a shark now sits dressed as a house with its mouth open Shark:[nervously makes house noises]"

"Why isn't there a Windows 9? ""Hey Microsoft, why is there no Windows 9? You've given us 7 and 8, and now you're skipping straight to 10?"" ""Well, to be completely honest, 7 8 9."""

"Granddad once told me there's one requirement for a funny joke... And it's telling it in a funny voice."

"How many 1980s R & B divas does it take to fix a broken lightbulb? Just one, but they fix the crack by torchlight"

"Why can't a bicycle stand up? It is two tired."

"U2 are one of Ireland's most successful bands. Or according to their tax returns, one of Netherlands' least successful hardware store owners."

"What is a Rastafarian's favorite country? Yemen"

"What do you get if you cross a SJW and Jason Voorhees? Social justice."