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Joke of the Day

"There are two secrets to being a successful businessman. 1) Never tell people everything you know... 2)"

"When I was younger, they used to be able to tell me and my twin brother apart by our balls. He'd bawl at night and I'd bawl during the day."

"What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaaaaaayyyyy! Sounds better with a stereotypical SOA biker voice. I'll show myself out."

"I haven't spoken to my wife in months... We're not having any problems, I just don't want to interrupt her."

"What was the under-appreciated, often-exploited kitchen contractor's complaint? I'm always taken for granite!"

"A guy just told me ""All asians are ninjas"" I wanted to tell him how racist that was, but he was black and i didn't want to get beat down"

"Why was drug addicted Moses upset when he was floating down a river? because he was in Da-Nile"

"I'm doing interval training. It's just that the intervals are very far apart."

"when I have dinner with a vegetarian I order two steaks to use as a bun for my third steak"

"Golfer Adam Scott's wife had a baby today It was a cesarean But he didn't make the cut."