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Joke of the Day

"Why do engineering majors refer to themselves ""engineers""? You don't see literature majors calling themselves Starbucks baristas"

"Music Jokes! Jake: What did the Clarinet say to the naughty Trumpet? Sean: What? Jake: Why are you always in treble?"

"Our teacher talks to herself does yours ? Yes but she does't realise it she thinks we're actually listening !"

"Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Ba dum tss."

"""You miss 100% of the shots you never take."" - Wayne Gretzky ""You miss 100% of the shots you DO take."" - Stormtroopers"

"A friend of mine recently asked me what ballerina's wear... But I just couldn't put tu and tu together."

"The Middle East reminds me of that old joke about the optimist and the pessimist The pessimist says ""everything's terrible, it can't get any worse."" the optimist says ""oh yes it can."""

"I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week Phoned her up to arrange a date, but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs."

"What can a homeless figure skater do to get by? Turn-tricks"

"Did you know that the new iPhone 5 helps people lose weight? When you pay for it you can't afford to eat for a month."