102199

Joke of the Day

"In was in a bar the other day. The barman said ""I see your glass is empty. Do you want another one?"" Why the fuck would I want 2 empty glasses?"

"Ok, don't let them know you're a puma Interviewer: We're very impressed! You've got the job! ""REALLY!?! I'M SO HAPPY I JUST PUMA PANTS"""

"Me: Can I please sleep? Brain: No. Now sing Mambo #5 again. Me: But I hate that song! Brain: I don't give a shit! Me: 1, 2, 3-4-5..."

"The problem majoring in Electrical Engineering... is keeping up with Current Events."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a repost."

"Can February march? No, but April may."

"When your kids become teenagers, it's important to have a dog So someone in the house is happy to see you."

"What will the Easter Bunny be doing after Easter? One to three for breaking and entering."

"What is Andreev-Reflection? When electrons are reflected assholes by a superconductor."

"A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer..... ........ than the men who mention it."