10010

Joke of the Day

"Not to brag but I have approximately 5000 compact discs I haven't listened to since 2003 that are preventing me from moving on with my life."

"What's it called when you a kill a sapling? Arbortion"

"My teacher said he doesn't like imaginary numbers because the uses are limited. I asked him whether he was for reals."

"What do you call an Asian gold digger? Cha Ching"

"my dad always makes fun of me for taking selfies all the time but if he didn't want such a beautiful child he should've kept it in his pants"

"THERAPIST: You're cured. ME: Really?!? THERAPIST: No, of course not. How did that make you feel?"

"""YES, MOM! NO CRUST! You've been making my sandwiches for 37 years now, STOP ASKING!"" *mom leaves crust on so you'll finally move out*"

"Is it racist if a guy with a small dick calls it his ding dong?"

"What did the father buffalo say to his son when he left the farm? Bison"

"They say celebrities die in threes... Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson. Leave it to Billy Mays to throw in the fourth for free."