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Joke of the Day
"Where do you get bare minerals from? A strip mine"
Next Joke
"Turtles often outlive their owners, a fact the police refuse to treat as suspicious"
"Only 90's kids will remember this! *plays outside*"
"She's so wrinkled, her mother was a Shar Pei."
"An Irish girl tells her mother that she's decided to become a prostitute. ""A WHAT?!"" her mother says. ""A prostitute,"" the daughter says. ""Thank god,"" the mother says. ""I thought you said Protestant."""
"How many eggs do the French use in their omelettes? Just one, because in France one egg is un oeuf."
"Girls can be so ungrateful, I made her breakfast in bed, & instead of saying ""Thank You"", she's all like ""How did you get into my house!"""
"*thinks happy thoughts* *throws pixie dust in your eyes* *flies off with all your money*"
"What do you call a teeth specialist who writes books? An author-dontist Wahey!"
"My local Greek restaurant just started serving tacos and burritos.... I tried it earlier today and it turns out it's plain old Greecey Mexican food."