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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I get the urge to run around naked.. But then I just drink some Windex. It keeps me from streaking."

"A Jew walks into a bank... ""Honey I'm home!"""

"John Cena wakes up in the hospital He has no idea what is going on. A nurse walks into his room and he asks, ""Where am I?"" She responded, ""ICU."" He said,""No you don't."""

"She often thinks about what life may have been outside the asylum, had the cashier refrained from putting her change on top of the receipt."

"1. Dial random number. 2. Wait for answering machine. 3. Say ""My wife is out of town, I miss you"". 4. Hang up. 5. Happy Valentine's Day."

"Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman."

"Thank goodness I'm loud and obnoxious all the time, so my family can't blame it on the alcohol."

"List of the best jokes on this sub: https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/3x7nqa/list_of_the_best_jokes_on_this_sub/"

"A Jewish boy asks his father for $20. His father says, ""Ten dollars? What do you need five dollars for?"""

"Where do you take someone who overdoses on homeopathic medicine? A mental hospital"