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Joke of the Day

"""I'd do filthy things to that Princess from Star Wars"" *""What, Leia?""* ""Well obviously - but I was thinking more of a rim-job and a soapy titwank"""

"Why are American police officers so bad at snooker? They always shoot the black"

"Is it solipsistic in here or is it just me?"

"What's it called when you borrow cheese from a friend? taking out a provoloan"

"I went to the Zoo once. It had only one dog. It was a Shitzu."

"What did the owner of the Indian restaurant say when he burned all of his bread? ""Don't worry, it's a naan issue."""

"Do you know the Greek version of Monopoly? It's called Monopoulos and you just borrow all the money from the bank. Everyone loses."

"What did cinderella say when she got to the ball? NSFW *gagging noise*"

"I wish that people who hear me sing could hear how awesome I sound in my head instead of how I actually sound."

"In bed my wife calls my Jimmy John's. I cum freaky fast."