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Joke of the Day

"Got really drunk and had unprotected sex with the cashier at 7-11 last night. Hope I don't catch slurpees."

"""I bet you can't name two different structures that hold water!"" Well, dam..."

"You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg."

"You should be able to make your GPS call you a code name. ""Bobcat, in 3.1 miles turn left"" ""Recalculating, Bobcat, you're going rogue."""

"What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? There's only one Bender in Futurama"

"The perfect response to ""there's a party in my pants and everyone's coming"" ""Is it a search party?"" Ba-dum-tiss.."

"I like my women like I like my rice... Hot, white, and with my meat in it."

"Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F."

"Do you know how to cook toilet paper? Me either, but I know how to brown it on one side."

"Come Party! I tried to host a bukakke party... but nobody came."