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Joke of the Day

"Why do porn stars make terrible boxers? Because they don't know how to make a proper fist."

"I drank too much over the holidays. I was at the doctor's yesterday and gave a urine sample. It had an olive in it."

"Did you hear about the band the hipster liked? No, no you didn't."

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea??? I wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."

"I got a good one for you guys 1"

"What did the police do to the sweater? They pulled it over."

"What happens when you drink food colouring? You dye a little on the inside."

"Why did Jerry Hall marry Rupert Murdoch? He's not much to look at, but he's a great listener."

"My wife has packed her things and left me... My wife has packed her things and left me due to my obsession with glass objects. Frankly, I'm shattered."

"You only have one childhood, it may as well last your entire life."