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Joke of the Day
"Roses are red, violets are blue... I've got no girlfriend, so porn hub will do."
Next Joke
"When it comes to gay sex, I think the backwards views of my grandfather are disgusting So I might try missionary style with him instead"
"*takes call from mom* *puts mom on speaker* *cleans entire house*"
"You'll find there's truly so much beauty in the world if you'll just look at the right desktop wallpaper websites"
"I was going to kill myself. A : A week ago I wanted to kill myself. B : What? How? A : I'd jump off the roof. B : What changed your mind? A : I'm afraid of heights."
"ARE YOU A MAN OR A MOUSE? ""Haha a man obviously"" *Detective places cheese on table* *suspect starts to sweat*"
"Balloon's What's a balloon's favorite genre of music? Pop."
"Just found out I've been using my Britta pitcher wrong for the last 2 months #nofilter"
"Megan, but with an H? Whatever you say, girls named Hmegan."
"You have orgasms all the time. Even if you don't have sex, I know you masturbate. You're a liar if you say you don't. Sexy"