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Joke of the Day

"What sort of undergarments does a succinct pugilist wear? Boxer briefs!"

"Why can a Cheetah not hide? Because it's always spotted."

"Good cop: we found her body in the river Cop who doesn't want people knowing he can't swim: I was sick that day otherwise I'd have found it"

"Why did the prostitute had a second vagina transplanted on her hip? So she could make money on the side."

"So this one time I offered some shrimp to this Jewish friend of mine... Me: This shrimp is great. Wanna try some? Friend: Sorry, I'm Jewish. Me: No, it's free! *from a comic by Cyanide and Happiness*"

"My mom asks if I could help her bake bread this Christmas. She kneads me."

"A rapist a gangster and a murderer are in the same car... Who is driving the car? A police officer!"

"What did the old fly say to the young fly? I've seen a lot of shit!"

"Mental note, its inappropriate, according to the HR department, to put your hand on the back of a female coworkers head as she eats a banana"

"Potter household Voldemort: knock knock James: who's there? Voldemort: you know James: you know who? Voldemort: correct James: James: Fuck"