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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes, eating is very similar to driving. You trust stale greens"

"Deleting your Facebook is the new regaining your dignity."

"Last night I slept with my contact lenses on. My dreams have never been clearer."

"Why are pills white? Because if they were black they wouldn't work."

"Why can't you fool an aborted baby? NSFW Because it wasn't born yesterday."

"why are Asians so smart? because they get alot of brain"

"I like my women how I like my advent calendar. Against my wall, flaps open, ready to be eaten."

"I always scroll to see how long an article is before I don't read it."

"How does Boomhower describe the Genitals of the Lieutenant from the Reno Police Department? Dang ol' Dangle dangle."

"Why did the chicken crossed the road? To piss off drivers"