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Joke of the Day

"Two pedophiles sitting on a bench A 12 year old passes by. One pedophile looks at the other and says: Aaah, time forgives no-one. She must've been a stunner in her days"

"When a necrophiliac goes to a funeral... He gets mourning wood."

"Daughter: Dad, can I have some Kit Kat for my snack tonight? Me: Absolutely not D: Why? M: Because I said so D: Because you ate them? M: Yes"

"If a stranger catches you taking their photo, let them know it's okay by softly saying, ""Don't worry, this is just for me"""

"How come men don't watch women's ice hockey? No man can handle that many periods."

"Why should you never invite a boxer to a party? He always throws the punch."

"What did the butcher say to the cow? ...I love you for your inner beauty."

"Hippos... It's not as easy as you think... Why do hippopotamus' have sex in the water? Have you ever tried keeping a 30lb pussy wet?"

"I unplugged my carbon monoxide detector from the wall today All that beeping was giving me headaches and making me feel nauseous"

"What did the neckbeard wizard use to find his way around Hogwarts? M'rauders Map"