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Joke of the Day
"My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain. Adios Omegas."
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"What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer"
"Why is DJ Khaled so good at music? He loves major keys."
"Party host: Anyone here allergic to nuts? Because I like to rest mine on the table."
"Where did the belly button go to school? The Navel Academy"
"Out in public, my husband and I only argue using whale sounds, so it's actually a very calm and soothing experience for people around us."
"It's that time of the month for robots iPads"
"Babe are you a clock? Cause you're the bomb"
"How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor."
"Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A: Because the chicken wasn't invented yet."