90919

Joke of the Day

"I like the show on fox news where there are 4 conservative idiots yelling at one liberal idiot."

"I asked the doctor how much longer I've got. He said, ""A few inches. You clearly enjoy prostate exams."""

"Here's a joke about cancer... about 1/3 of you guys will get it."

"The Top Three things for Halloween you can do now in North Carolina: #3 Swim with the sharks, #2 Have an account on Ashley Madison, #1 riding a street car in Charlotte NC."

"What do you see when you go to the tiny beach? Microwaves."

"In a few weeks the keys to the worlds most important office will be handed over to Donald Trump. There is absolutely nothing funny about that. Figured this sub was a perfect place to post this."

"Why can't you see a transgender who's a dad? Because he's a transparent. Apologies if I could've worded it different."

"Why are Jewish men circumcised? Jewish women won't touch anything that isn't 10% off."

"How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas? He felt his presents!"

"Micky and Minnie Mouse get Divorced The Lawyers says to Micky: ""so you're getting a divorce because Minnie's crazy you say?"" Micky replies frustrated:""No she's not crazy she's fucking goofy!"""