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Joke of the Day

"My Uncle was fired for sleeping with one of his patients... The worst part is that he's a veterinarian. Lol just kidding, he's a pediatrician."

Next Joke
 
"Whats the best part of having sex with a transvestite? Reaching around and pretending it went all the way through."
"Mexico replaced America as the world's fattest country because we sent them all home."
"Saturday plans: -get abducted then hunted by a group of rich guys on a game reserve, then systematically take them out one by one. - laundry"
"I was invited to an event that requires causal dress. Should I wear a time machine or a syllogism print?"
"What do Asgardians use to keep food hot? A Thormos."
"A guy comes in a bar My bad, it's actually a horse. So a guy comes in a horse..."
"Dicksuckers Cramp Guy 1: ""You know what this face is?"" *Holds mouth open in an O* Guy 2: ""No, what?"" Guy 1: ""Dicksuckers Cramp, get it?"" Guy 2: ""Yeah"" Guy 1: ""How often?"""
"I booked a suite at a 5 star hotel and when my girlfriend arrived,on the bed spelled out in rose petals was ""be right out,I'm taking a shit"""
"Bought some shoes from my drug dealer. idk what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day"