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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my dick up your arse"

"Why did the cannibal have an upset stomach? He ate someone who disagreed with him."

"Why did the semen cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning."

"My girlfriend lost all her hair during chemotherapy and she was crying for hours. I said, ""Why are you so upset? It's just hair. I'm the one that's gotta find a new girlfriend."""

"I was playing 'would you rather', and asked my girlfriend if she'd rather be a goat or a cow for the rest of her life. She asked me which one I'd rather fuck."

"*pulls away from kissing -What does CVS stand for?"

"What's the technical term for a female-to-male sex change operation? A strapadictomy."

"Today I met a woman with twelve breasts, sounds strange, dozen tit?"

"Criminal: Why don't you hire these twins for the robbery boss? Criminal Boss: I'm afraid of a double-cross."

"""Mom! I'm going out!"" - You're not leaving this house until you change that miniskirt - Why not? - Because I can see your balls, Richard."