90472

Joke of the Day

"What did the banana say to the vibrator? ""I don't know why you're shaking, I'm the one about to be eaten!"""

"I once knew an Asian lady with one leg... Her name was Irene."

"Why did the farmer name his pig ""pork Chop"" Because 'Bacon' was already taken."

"Don't know if the boss will appreciate my sense of humor in this meeting, but either way the stripper is already paid for."

"Movie joke: Sling Blade ""Two fellers was peein' off a bridge. One said the water's cold. Other the the water's deep.... I think one of 'em was from Arkansas mhmm."""

"My mother arrives on Friday, so I have to do three months worth of cleaning in 48 hours. Also, lose 30 pounds and live up to my potential."

"Not all astrophysicists are bad. I'm sure at least one of them's a really Feynman."

"Baby circumcision [Imgur](http://i.imgur.com/DbgAFxp.jpg)"

"What do you call a hooker laying down? Whorizontal. Thanks, I'll show myself out."

"The FineBros remind me of a movie villian... ...they revealed their master plan via monologue and were stopped before they could end the world."